Artist Statement

I am a mixed-race Asian American woman. My mom was born in Taiwan and hails from a Chinese family while my dad was born in Massachusetts and hails from a mainly western European family. People of mixed race tend to identify with their minority half, which is what I have done for the majority of my life. Growing up, my immediate family was very close with my extended family on both sides. My mom did her best to infuse my sister and me with the culture she grew up with but because she lived in America for most of her life, there was only so much she could teach us. Since we were kids, my sister and I never looked like our parents or either side of our family. While this was a subtle element of my childhood, it still carved a hole within my sense of belonging.

This has left me feeling somewhat incomplete – besides my sister, there aren’t a lot of people that I have been able to share this feeling with. When I describe this disconnect with my Caucasian friends, they tell me that I don’t have to identify with any one group and that I can just rely on my own identity. What they don’t understand is my Chinese culture is a part of my identity, so I feel whole when I am connected to my Chinese heritage.

Over the past 2 years, I have been unable to see my family which has further impacted my connection to my Chinese identity. Covid has kept me from seeing family when we used to all get together regularly. I’ve also found that our connections have been lessened as my generation grows into adulthood and no longer has the time or opportunity to gather very often. I used to take Chinese in school to fulfill my language requirement, but I hadn’t realized that speaking Chinese maintained a that connection. I haven’t taken Chinese in two years and have had no opportunities to practice with my family to the point where I barely understand Chinese when I hear it. All my life, no matter how developed my Chinese speaking was, I was able to understand Chinese when it was spoken, but now I can’t seem to keep up. My Wai-po (maternal grandmother) passed away in April of 2020 while we were all in lockdown due to covid. She was the matriarch of my family and always brought my family together and losing her severed yet another connection.

This work captures these feelings and holes in my identity. My sister and I don’t look fully Chinese or fully white and it’s hard to place us in any racial category. The designs in the background and the Chinese characters represent our Chinese heritage. The characters on each painting are our Chinese names, given to us by our Wai-gong (maternal grandfather) at birth. Placing my sister and I are in the foreground, distant from the background maintains a level of distance from our cultural and familial identities. This work is a physical representation of the struggle mixed race individuals like myself and my sister experience to find a balance within their identity to feel whole and a sense of belonging.

Valerie Downing

About the Artist

Valerie Downing is a Baltimore-based artist currently studying at Loyola University Maryland. Ever since she was young, she has been taught and influenced by other artistic members of her family, but her mom is the one who has most impacted her creative development. Downing’s mom was a freelance artist for a period, painting commissioned portraits or selling her still life’s, usually working with watercolor paints. Downing’s parents were always very supportive of any of her artistic endeavors but her passion for creating art began when she started high school. It was her first time taking art classes in school, and it quickly became her favorite subject. Not only did she have wonderful art teachers from school, but she also had her mom at home to help develop her skills. Downing’s mom and art teachers encouraged her to enter pieces into local art competitions and exhibitions which was what first put her work on the map.

Downing’s work has been exhibited at the Annual Juried Art Exhibit at the Yellow Barn Studio at Glen Echo Park (MD) and was awarded Best in Show for the Rockville Student Art Contest. Most recently, she has completed a series of commissioned paintings and is now selling her work online.

Inspired by the painting portraiture of Norman Rockwell and Kehinde Wiley, Downing admires their ability to depict the human form in intimate ways while still maintaining realistic representation, and she tries to incorporate this essence in her work. She mostly works with oil paints, but also has experience working with pen and ink, pencil, pastels, acrylic paints, watercolor, and gouache. Portraits are her specialty, although she paints landscapes and still life’s too. Downing is very drawn to painting humans, particularly women and children, as she enjoys the challenge of capturing humanity within a painting and relating that to her audience. She maintains that there is a connection that can be achieved through portraiture that reminds viewers of the altruism and heart that all people share, and her goal is to access this connection through her art.